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Truth is..
Posted November 16th 2011 at 06:34 PM by LlamaLlamaDuck
Updated May 21st 2012 at 10:27 PM by LlamaLlamaDuck
Updated May 21st 2012 at 10:27 PM by LlamaLlamaDuck
I'm so tired. I woke up this morning and wanted to cry. Didn't make it into class. Checked this week's work and did in the silent study room off the 3rd floor library. Finished early and went home.
My brother's been off sick all week, I'm worried about him. He's been getting headaches for a while but Monday he said he had a bad headache, was dizzy, and felt sick. The doctor checked him over and couldn't find anything wrong, but he has some pills to take with paracetamol/ibuprofen every few hours to see if they help. But now his throat's all sore and he's gone hoarse. Doctor reckons its migraines but I'm still worried about him. :/ I was glad to get home earlier than expected so I could check he was alright.
I'm worrying about Monday. I have a test in the afternoon so even if I get to college and wind up crying in the toilets again, I have to stay. It's hard to believe it's almost been a year already. This time last year I would have just got home from his house with mum and would be in my room. It scares me how fast things can happen. How in 24 hours I had gone from being distracted but just living normally, to having to deal with losing such a huge part of my life. I can't handle that happening again. I'm scared it might.
I need the people in my life right now more than I think I can ever say.
I really need a hug but I'm scared I'll cry.
I'm scared to be alone at night to face the nightmares myself.
And I really don't know how to deal with any of this.
My brother's been off sick all week, I'm worried about him. He's been getting headaches for a while but Monday he said he had a bad headache, was dizzy, and felt sick. The doctor checked him over and couldn't find anything wrong, but he has some pills to take with paracetamol/ibuprofen every few hours to see if they help. But now his throat's all sore and he's gone hoarse. Doctor reckons its migraines but I'm still worried about him. :/ I was glad to get home earlier than expected so I could check he was alright.
I'm worrying about Monday. I have a test in the afternoon so even if I get to college and wind up crying in the toilets again, I have to stay. It's hard to believe it's almost been a year already. This time last year I would have just got home from his house with mum and would be in my room. It scares me how fast things can happen. How in 24 hours I had gone from being distracted but just living normally, to having to deal with losing such a huge part of my life. I can't handle that happening again. I'm scared it might.
I need the people in my life right now more than I think I can ever say.
I really need a hug but I'm scared I'll cry.
I'm scared to be alone at night to face the nightmares myself.
And I really don't know how to deal with any of this.
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