Log in (
6 weeks.
Posted October 3rd 2011 at 07:44 PM by LlamaLlamaDuck
That's right, ladies and gents. Yesterday was six weeks since I last.. how do I put it. Since I last broke skin intentionally. I'd say cut myself, but I do that all the time without meaning to. I'd say hurt myself intentionally, but I did that about 5 weeks ago.
Basically it's 6 weeks free and those 6 weeks have flown. I think it's a good thing that I don't even really think about it much and haven't been eating less or wanting to overdose instead. I'm actually quite proud of myself if you don't mind me saying.
I'd like to give some emotional speech or something about how it's the support of my friends and everyone that's made it possible for me to get this far, and to be fair, my friends have certainly helped. But on the worst nights, no matter how much I thought about it or how bad I wanted to, I honestly don't think I could have. I can't let my parents down like that. I never want to have to have a conversation that starts with "I know you've been cutting yourself" with them again. I'm doing this for my parents, and my family.
I'm doing it so my papa can look down on me and be proud of what I can achieve. Almost a year on and I still think about him every day, I want to make him proud of me and be glad to have me as his granddaughter. Hey, I'm the only granddaughter, I have a lot to live up to here.
I'm fighting so hard to get past this all on my own and I think it's mostly the fact that I'm so bloody stubborn that's actually allowed me to get this far. I haven't taken my antidepressants for over a month and when I speak to the doctor on Thursday I want to tell her/him that I don't want any more of them. They haven't made a difference and I want to be able to do this myself.
I sent away my photo and ID proof this morning so my provisional license should be here in about 2 weeks meaning I can start learning how to drive. Isn't that great considering we're expecting snow at the end of October?
If I were you, I'd get all my Christmas and food shopping for the next decade done now, because once I'm on the roads, you're screwed. 
I have terrible hand-eye co ordination.
Good luck to you all!
Basically it's 6 weeks free and those 6 weeks have flown. I think it's a good thing that I don't even really think about it much and haven't been eating less or wanting to overdose instead. I'm actually quite proud of myself if you don't mind me saying.
I'd like to give some emotional speech or something about how it's the support of my friends and everyone that's made it possible for me to get this far, and to be fair, my friends have certainly helped. But on the worst nights, no matter how much I thought about it or how bad I wanted to, I honestly don't think I could have. I can't let my parents down like that. I never want to have to have a conversation that starts with "I know you've been cutting yourself" with them again. I'm doing this for my parents, and my family.
I'm doing it so my papa can look down on me and be proud of what I can achieve. Almost a year on and I still think about him every day, I want to make him proud of me and be glad to have me as his granddaughter. Hey, I'm the only granddaughter, I have a lot to live up to here.
I'm fighting so hard to get past this all on my own and I think it's mostly the fact that I'm so bloody stubborn that's actually allowed me to get this far. I haven't taken my antidepressants for over a month and when I speak to the doctor on Thursday I want to tell her/him that I don't want any more of them. They haven't made a difference and I want to be able to do this myself.
I sent away my photo and ID proof this morning so my provisional license should be here in about 2 weeks meaning I can start learning how to drive. Isn't that great considering we're expecting snow at the end of October?
If I were you, I'd get all my Christmas and food shopping for the next decade done now, because once I'm on the roads, you're screwed. I have terrible hand-eye co ordination.Good luck to you all!
Total Comments 2
Comments
-
This makes me proud. I am proud of you and this gives me hope. You're doing fab girly!Posted October 3rd 2011 at 08:36 PM by Palmolive
-
That is great to hear Louise. I am so proud of you. Keep up the good work xDPosted October 5th 2011 at 08:40 AM by Jovial.
