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College. Placement. Sociology. Great.
Posted February 7th 2011 at 05:46 PM by LlamaLlamaDuck
Went into college today. Actually went on time but sat in the library instead of going to class. Linda wasn't in so I winded up with my course tutor Shona and Linda's boss, Ann.
They sat me down in this room and went over what my email had said about not coping with college and not being able to handle dealing with people.
Shona started asking if I had any physical coping mechanisms I could use to feel better in the morning so I'm more motivated to come in. I wanted to tell her that I do have self harm but instead told her I had nothing. I don't want her feeling sorry for me.
She asked how things had gone with my doctor and I told her, when she asked what other mental health issues I was seeing my doctor for I explained how I became a lot more paranoid after everything with my family. She just nodded and all I could see was sympathy in her eyes. I hate when people start feeling sorry for me. Hate it.
Either way, after about 20 minutes of talking, we decided that I'd start doing placement two days a week instead of one because I like it a lot and I'll spend Monday morning at college filling in my logbook for placement with everyone else and the afternoon in sociology. Sounds alright to me, really.
She doesn't think I'm emotionally ready to do the HNC in Social Care next year like I wanted to either and told me I should take a year out to 'get better'.
Oddly, my mum is okay with it. Probably because I didn't tell her everything. Just that the reason I was only doing placement is because that's the only thing I need from the course. In reality, they're taking me out of the other classes for 'health reasons'
But that might change in block 3 which starts in 2 weeks. And meanwhile I have to study for, and pass, a formative assessment on the same subject I spent the whole of my last year at high school trying to get out of. Actually, had I just gone for it and sat the exam, I wouldn't even have to do it this year. Fml.
Hoping that I don't have to see the doctor on my own either next time, but we'll see.
Meanwhile, I have to REALLY clear up my room and talk mum into letting my girl stay here for a whole week.
Wish me luck!
They sat me down in this room and went over what my email had said about not coping with college and not being able to handle dealing with people.
Shona started asking if I had any physical coping mechanisms I could use to feel better in the morning so I'm more motivated to come in. I wanted to tell her that I do have self harm but instead told her I had nothing. I don't want her feeling sorry for me.
She asked how things had gone with my doctor and I told her, when she asked what other mental health issues I was seeing my doctor for I explained how I became a lot more paranoid after everything with my family. She just nodded and all I could see was sympathy in her eyes. I hate when people start feeling sorry for me. Hate it.
Either way, after about 20 minutes of talking, we decided that I'd start doing placement two days a week instead of one because I like it a lot and I'll spend Monday morning at college filling in my logbook for placement with everyone else and the afternoon in sociology. Sounds alright to me, really.
She doesn't think I'm emotionally ready to do the HNC in Social Care next year like I wanted to either and told me I should take a year out to 'get better'.
Oddly, my mum is okay with it. Probably because I didn't tell her everything. Just that the reason I was only doing placement is because that's the only thing I need from the course. In reality, they're taking me out of the other classes for 'health reasons'
But that might change in block 3 which starts in 2 weeks. And meanwhile I have to study for, and pass, a formative assessment on the same subject I spent the whole of my last year at high school trying to get out of. Actually, had I just gone for it and sat the exam, I wouldn't even have to do it this year. Fml.
Hoping that I don't have to see the doctor on my own either next time, but we'll see.
Meanwhile, I have to REALLY clear up my room and talk mum into letting my girl stay here for a whole week.
Wish me luck!
Total Comments 1
Comments
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You have to do what is best for you. If you feel doing the Hnc next year will be too much then take a year out and get yourself better. I had to take a year out of my course because everything fell apart.
I hope the talk with your mum goes well. Good luck!Posted February 7th 2011 at 05:56 PM by *Jen*
