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Missing You Is Painful

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Posted January 11th 2009 at 09:49 PM by Laura Love

It's beinging to get so hard having this long distance between Tommy and I. I think it would be a lot easier if he was home a little more often or had time to talk to me but he's been so busy with work that there has been little to no time to talk to me. Sure I understand that he's been busy working and that he's getting money to move here and that he's trying to do all he can right now so when he tells them that I'm going to come visit in April they'll hopefully give him the time off...but as of right now this is hard and it's starting to hurt. I don't really know how to explain the pain, it's just this deep aching in my heart and my chest gets heavy and I have a hard time breathing. I miss him so much that not only do I hurt emotionally but I'm hurting physically. He keeps reminding me that he's working so much and such for us and I get that but I'm also entitled to miss him and have it effect me. Then again in some aspects I feel like I'm being selfish and that I'm over reacting but I can't seem to help how I feel with him being gone as much as he has been. I try to occupy my times with other things and with talking to other people but no one can seem to make me laugh and smile just as much or quite like he does..and the past few months with having him gone my depression has kicked into full swing. It's hard cause I want to depend on him a little and have him help me threw this low but I don't want to bring it up while we are talking either and ruin the night with my bad mood. Gawh, this is just so hard and complicated, I honestly wish I knew what to do....
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