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Feeling pretty un-awesome. Private Entry

Posted February 20th 2013 at 08:18 AM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

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Awesomesauce.
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Old

>.<

Posted February 19th 2013 at 11:25 PM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

Sometimes it feels like everybody's suicidal and there's nothing I can do to help because you're all so far away. Seriously, what's with that? How am I meant to help you, or even comfort you, when you're so far away? I wish I could. I wish I could.

I know I'm not in the best place myself, with self-harm and that, but I'm not directly suicidal either. Oh sure, I have thoughts, and a plan, and the means, but I no longer have a timeframe. I could kill myself. But I don't want to. Because...
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Awesomesauce.
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Views 359 Comments 1 i_like_black is offline
Old

*sigh*

Posted February 18th 2013 at 10:09 PM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

I didn't sleep well. I woke up so many times that I can't count them. My new flatmate snores. I just kept waking up. And waking up. And waking up some more.

Then my flatmate got up and had a shower. This wasn't too early, some time between nine and ten, but at that point I just gave up on the whole idea of sleep. It was obvious I wasn't going to get any more.

She left water all over the bathroom floor. Obviously doesn't use a bath mat. And hair, too. I'm not impressed....
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Awesomesauce.
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Views 326 Comments 2 i_like_black is offline
Old

Oh so.

Posted February 18th 2013 at 05:21 AM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

New flatmate.
Positive: flushes the toilet, shuts the fridge, often shuts bedroom door.
Negative: eats canned fish (which is smelly), watches lots of tv, leaves water on the bench.

:/
It's so obvious how much I can't deal with strangers. Ever since she got here I've been freaking out. Unfortunately she didn't get here until late this afternoon, so my entire team will have gone home, so I can't tell anybody. Not that telling anybody would change anything anyway....
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Awesomesauce.
Posted in Uncategorized
Views 486 Comments 0 i_like_black is offline
Old

Things are about to change.

Posted February 17th 2013 at 07:51 AM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

And I'm not sure how I feel about that.

My new flatmate moves in tomorrow. I've only met her once, and only briefly, so I pretty much have no idea what she's like. I know she's on the med run. I'm hoping she doesn't notice my lack of medication currently. I'm hoping she just keeps to herself and lets me do the same.

I cleaned up the house. Well, I suppose I could still vacuum and a few minor things, but for the large majority of it, the house is my usual standard of...
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Awesomesauce.
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Views 262 Comments 0 i_like_black is offline
Old

:)

Posted February 16th 2013 at 08:01 AM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

Well, a good day!

Upon contemplation I think lack of sleep has been impacting my mood severely, which is actually what my key worker implied at our appointment yesterday.

Anyway, last night, or early this morning if you want to be pedantic, I didn't cut. I thought about it and I wanted to, but I didn't. I went to bed instead. And my bed felt so damn comfy. I was laying there like, omg my bed is so squishy it's giving my back hugs. Which was nice. And boded well for...
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Awesomesauce.
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Views 250 Comments 1 i_like_black is offline
Old

And more. (SH triggering again.) Private Entry

Posted February 15th 2013 at 07:42 AM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

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Awesomesauce.
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Views 8 Comments 1 i_like_black is offline
Old

When stuff. (triggering SH . . .) Private Entry

Posted February 14th 2013 at 08:33 AM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

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Awesomesauce.
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Old

Stuff. Private Entry

Posted February 11th 2013 at 10:55 AM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

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Awesomesauce.
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Good and bad stuff. Private Entry

Posted February 9th 2013 at 11:55 PM by i_like_black (Being good at being stupid doesn't count.)

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Awesomesauce.
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Views 4 Comments 0 i_like_black is offline
 
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