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Exercise stooffs and relationship stooffs. [possibly triggering?]

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Posted March 6th 2010 at 10:47 PM by i_like_black

Exercise stooffs - possibly triggering?

4x sets of 25 each uppers, lowers, on back, sides and front.
4x sets of ~15 wide arms press ups from knees.
3x sets of 6 of each a bunch of a dumbell exercises I can't remember the names of.

It took me around an hour. It didn't feel like enough, but I couldn't remember any more and I was running out of steam. I guess I'll do it again tomorrow. I have to.

Me and Laura pretty much broke up. It's very confusing all I've wanted to do since then is go back in time and undo what I said so she'd never leave. I never am aware of how much I miss her and how much I want her until she's not here. She's out trying to get a boyfriend. Not because she likes boys all that much, she doesn't think naked guys are attractive, but because she thinks penises feel good. And being unemployed, I haven't had the money for us to go and get something that properly simulates a penis.
She sent some guy she just met photos of herself naked. She said she didn't have her face in them. But she enjoyed being able to send them.

But she's just as confused as me by the sounds of things. We were texting last night and she seems as lost as I am. She won't come back for a loooooong time, I know this, but I hope that it doesn't work out with any one else either. I know she loves me. Even if she doesn't want to admit it. In her is a little thing like inside me - that's how we ended up back together after last year.

I'll just see how it goes. Keep exercising, because I'm still overweight, and maybe if I'm slender and attractive she'll want me. My face is ok. My body needs work lol. I also still haven't decided what sort of hairstyle to have. I chopped it all off a few weeks ago cos it got too hot, but I mildly regret it now because long hair is more feminine - and every time she's listed the physical things she likes about me, it's been the feminine ones.

Oh well. Wait and see, wait and see.


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