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Meh. Stooff.

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Posted March 1st 2010 at 11:28 PM by i_like_black

Meh, stooff.
I regret going to my sister's birthday. Sure we had good food, but it made me sick later. And Laura keeps getting mad at me for stuff I said there.

I have still been doing the exercise thing, same stuff each time, twice a day when I remember. Although the days have no clear line separating them. There's no work to go to, no university to study at, just endless, endless, at home wishing things would change. Just a small change, just someone to take the risk and hire me.

I like coaching. I'm not getting paid to do it yet, they had to put me on trial because of how I left last time. But I like it, even though it's only once a week. It's the main reason I'm exercising - I want to get strong enough to at least attempt some of the stiff my boys do.

I looked up layaways and uprises yesterday. I'm pretty sure I could do a layaway, it looks like it's just a confidence thing changing the angles of your shoulders and letting yourself go back below the bars. I know I don't have the strength to do uprises but I sort of understand them and I think I can explain them well enough that Kurtis and Italo should be able to do them.

I want to own my own gymnastics equipment. I've dreamed of it for years. It's so expensive though, thousands of dollars just for one apparatus a lot of the time.
I could go and exercise out at Counties but I think I'd still have to pay because Counties didn't give me any hours this term. Mike took them. That kiss ass bastard.
I could also ask Rowena if I could come in early, but I think at this stage that would probably be asking too much. I'll sort something out, I hope. I miss doing gymnastics in the same way I missed coaching gymnastics. And I think I missed coaching because it was my link to doing.

I looked up jobs today, woohoo. They all - still - want industry specific experience. Which means that basically, they're not going to hire me. I rang Jane the training manager from the New World down the road. She said they have people for those positions that were advertised and I didn't make it to the shortlist, even though I had experience in the areas specified. I hate being unemployed. I had to quit study because I'm unemployed, and I was planning on repeating a class I failed last semester. I failed the summer school stats paper I took because I couldn't afford to get there. I hate it. I hate being poor. I just want a job, so I can make something of my life.

*sigh*
comments plz?
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  1. Old Comment
    *Comments*

    Try to find some volunteer experience near your area? I might take a lot of work, but it doesn't hurt to look and keep looking :]
    permalink
    Posted March 2nd 2010 at 01:37 AM by Trickmatic Trickmatic is offline
 
 
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