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A bad night, I guess.
Posted April 24th 2013 at 11:41 PM by i_like_black
Or was it a bad morning?
I was having so much trouble concentrating, and then when I finally could concentrate, instead of concentrating I fixated, and unfortunately it was upon sad and depressing things.
So I mean, I probably should have taken quetiapine, but it was nearly midnight by this point so I decided not to. And well . . . just before I went to bed, (after midnight), there may have been a small amount of SH - but nothing major. Just stuff. And I'll probably get asked on Monday why I didn't take the quetiapine and I won't have any answer beyond "it was late".
And then when I was trying to go to sleep I was thinking all about jumping off bridges, and how the Golden Gate Bridge is a popular spot for suicide, and I wondered if the Auckland Harbour Bridge was the same height, and how I would get to the top of it . . . and then I wondered why I was wondering those things and hoped that in the morning I'd feel better, because before I went to sleep I felt fairly awful.
Well it's morning now, and I do feel a bit better, but I'm glad of that. I just sort of need to wear pants or long socks for a bit which is lame but hey, you make your bed, you lie in it.
I might clean my car today, and possibly warrant it. It's Anzac day so nowhere will be open until 1pm, so no pressure. It's not raining thus far today, which is good, because the part of the car wash where you vacuum your car isn't under cover.
. . . I'm odd.
I was having so much trouble concentrating, and then when I finally could concentrate, instead of concentrating I fixated, and unfortunately it was upon sad and depressing things.
So I mean, I probably should have taken quetiapine, but it was nearly midnight by this point so I decided not to. And well . . . just before I went to bed, (after midnight), there may have been a small amount of SH - but nothing major. Just stuff. And I'll probably get asked on Monday why I didn't take the quetiapine and I won't have any answer beyond "it was late".
And then when I was trying to go to sleep I was thinking all about jumping off bridges, and how the Golden Gate Bridge is a popular spot for suicide, and I wondered if the Auckland Harbour Bridge was the same height, and how I would get to the top of it . . . and then I wondered why I was wondering those things and hoped that in the morning I'd feel better, because before I went to sleep I felt fairly awful.
Well it's morning now, and I do feel a bit better, but I'm glad of that. I just sort of need to wear pants or long socks for a bit which is lame but hey, you make your bed, you lie in it.
I might clean my car today, and possibly warrant it. It's Anzac day so nowhere will be open until 1pm, so no pressure. It's not raining thus far today, which is good, because the part of the car wash where you vacuum your car isn't under cover.
. . . I'm odd.
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