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When you feel so tired, but you just can't sleep . . .
Posted January 2nd 2013 at 10:04 PM by i_like_black
Well, it's very broken sleep, and I'm tired all day. I've been having afternoon naps, where I fall asleep just enough to have those weird dreams where you're not entirely sure if you're dreaming or not (my mind likes to tell me I'm in different houses, for some reason), and then you wake up. Gives me maybe an hour extra sleep on top of what I'm getting at night, and I have no idea how much that is, I just know I wake up a lot.
I saw my probation officer today. She didn't ask many questions. I'm lower than I was. Too low to volunteer information.
Information like, I'm not taking my meds . . . I'm saving them.
I'm not self-harming very badly . . . but I am self-harming every day.
I haven't been arrested . . . yet.
I care less about getting my license than I thought I did.
I'm barely hungry, and barely eating - although I do plan on spending my remaining $2 on a loaf of bread, just in case.
I can concentrate, sort of. Not enough to read, not enough to play RuneScape. I can just manage blogging and forum browsing.
I should be seen by somebody from ICT.
Maybe I'll talk to Margaret later if she comes over to see Sam. I don't know.
I want off this ride.
I saw my probation officer today. She didn't ask many questions. I'm lower than I was. Too low to volunteer information.
Information like, I'm not taking my meds . . . I'm saving them.
I'm not self-harming very badly . . . but I am self-harming every day.
I haven't been arrested . . . yet.
I care less about getting my license than I thought I did.
I'm barely hungry, and barely eating - although I do plan on spending my remaining $2 on a loaf of bread, just in case.
I can concentrate, sort of. Not enough to read, not enough to play RuneScape. I can just manage blogging and forum browsing.
I should be seen by somebody from ICT.
Maybe I'll talk to Margaret later if she comes over to see Sam. I don't know.
I want off this ride.
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