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Things are so confusing.

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Posted October 10th 2012 at 07:56 AM by i_like_black

I went to see my keyworker, which is probably the smartest decision I've made in days.

I still feel awful and horrible but now it's just the depression doing its . . . thang.

Jens said he saw my whiteboard. He said it was good. I don't know what he meant by "good". Maybe it explained well. Maybe it made sense. I don't know. But I suppose it's positive if a doctor sees your messy-thoughts whiteboard and describes it as "good".

Because I still feel really off (and am still at quite a high risk, and can't convince myself to take my meds), I'm going to either respite or hospital tomorrow. Judy said it's my responsibility to get myself through tonight, but tomorrow I can go somewhere different have some . . . time out.

I'm really paranoid. Even Judy said the paranoia's coming across quite strongly at the moment.

I'm exhausted.
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