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Mildly apprehensive.
Posted September 28th 2012 at 08:35 AM by i_like_black
So I didn't take my meds in to my appointment with my keyworker.
And it was probation who narked on me.
Jens (my psychiatrist) came into my appointment to briefly assess what's going on. He said I'm not sleeping enough and I'm going far too fast - basically I'm still elevated - and he would really like me to be taking my medication. I told him it's not going to happen. He said, well what if you get depressed again? And I said, then I'll start taking it again. So he's made it PRN for now, also because I said I wanted to keep some incase I decided I wanted it to help me with sleep. He said many people find they are more stable if they take it regularly (no shit, it's an anti-psychotic also indicated as a mood stabiliser), but that he wasn't going to force the issue.
So I'm assuming as long as I keep behaving, I will be okay. As long as I'm just below that point . . . I'll be okay. There's a point at which your thoughts start happening outside your head and you basically lose your impulse control - I'm not there and I don't want to go there. I have no desire to waste time in hospital under a section, none at all. Although I do appreciate that I'm wandering along a very thin line at the moment.
So I'm mildly apprehensive as to what may happen if I go too high. According to my psychiatrist, my keyworker, and the psychiatrist I saw a couple of weeks ago at the cop shop, I'm already too high, but we are allowed differing opinions on this one. As far as I'm concerned, if I don't take my meds, but continue to ride the high and behave like a regular member of the public, then there's nothing they can do.
Judy says Probation have quite wide powers and that if they request information from mental health, then mental health has to provide it. As I pointed out, Probation rang Judy to give her information, but the fact remains that if probation are unhappy with how high I am and how I'm not taking my meds, I know they could put a warrant out under MHA 1992, because one went out for me last October. And the police are quite fast about responding to MHA warrants, because apparently timely assessment is important. Or whatever.
So yeah.
If I do get arrested/forced to go to hospital, they're going to have trouble on their hands. I LIKE living at home, and I will fight against that decision.
So yeah. Just updating y'all.
And it was probation who narked on me.
Jens (my psychiatrist) came into my appointment to briefly assess what's going on. He said I'm not sleeping enough and I'm going far too fast - basically I'm still elevated - and he would really like me to be taking my medication. I told him it's not going to happen. He said, well what if you get depressed again? And I said, then I'll start taking it again. So he's made it PRN for now, also because I said I wanted to keep some incase I decided I wanted it to help me with sleep. He said many people find they are more stable if they take it regularly (no shit, it's an anti-psychotic also indicated as a mood stabiliser), but that he wasn't going to force the issue.
So I'm assuming as long as I keep behaving, I will be okay. As long as I'm just below that point . . . I'll be okay. There's a point at which your thoughts start happening outside your head and you basically lose your impulse control - I'm not there and I don't want to go there. I have no desire to waste time in hospital under a section, none at all. Although I do appreciate that I'm wandering along a very thin line at the moment.
So I'm mildly apprehensive as to what may happen if I go too high. According to my psychiatrist, my keyworker, and the psychiatrist I saw a couple of weeks ago at the cop shop, I'm already too high, but we are allowed differing opinions on this one. As far as I'm concerned, if I don't take my meds, but continue to ride the high and behave like a regular member of the public, then there's nothing they can do.
Judy says Probation have quite wide powers and that if they request information from mental health, then mental health has to provide it. As I pointed out, Probation rang Judy to give her information, but the fact remains that if probation are unhappy with how high I am and how I'm not taking my meds, I know they could put a warrant out under MHA 1992, because one went out for me last October. And the police are quite fast about responding to MHA warrants, because apparently timely assessment is important. Or whatever.
So yeah.
If I do get arrested/forced to go to hospital, they're going to have trouble on their hands. I LIKE living at home, and I will fight against that decision.
So yeah. Just updating y'all.
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