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Posted July 13th 2012 at 06:22 AM by i_like_black

I got home about half an hour ago. I have been received with much less than a warm welcome, in fact all the humans seem somewhat hostile.

On the bright side, Linny (my cat) is absolutely over the moon to see me again, and the dog's (family dog, not mine personally) tail had a few wags for me.

I was discharged due to pressure for beds. The consensus is that although I'm not entirely well, I'm well enough to manage in a non-hospital environment. With my discharge I was given enough quetiapine to last me until Monday night, so Tuesday will be interesting because I don't get paid until Wednesday - and I sort of need money in order to pick up my script.

I remained informal for my entire hospital stay, from when I was admitted at 3:40am on 2 July 2012, to when I was discharged on 13 July 2012 at approximately 4:30pm. Today, that is. I was in Tui ICA from the 2nd until the morning of the 11th. Basically a secure unit, only 3 beds, 1:1 staff to patient ratio, and I was only allowed off-ward with an escort. Once I was moved to Tui (open ward) I was on 15/60 checks. I was still on 15/60 checks at the time of my discharge.

My mother has agreed to have me back temporarily on the condition that I find a new place to stay as soon as possible - she doesn't want me staying here. I don't entirely understand why, as me being in hospital doesn't affect her income or anything, but that's the way it is at the moment.

I spoke to my gym manager and she said we need to have a talk about me coming back. I've decided that based on that, I will resign, and I will resign in such a way that I can't be roped back into it. Coaching has been very stressful for a while now, I don't really enjoy it any more, and it's been contributing to my unwellness. Therefore it is genuinely in the best interests of all involved that I resign. Resignation will also free my timetable for other part-time work and potential study in the future.

I've committed myself to wellness. This means that, oddly enough, I'm going to be asking to do DBT, so that I have the opportunity to practise the skills. I'm also going to STAY on my medication (quetiapine 500mg nocte) as it has been helping, particularly with establishing a sleep routine.

Based on my less-than-warm welcome, I will be accepting the offer of housing with Sam Latham. Everybody says she's lovely, even the nurses at hospital, and I've met her before and we got along well. I just want to ring WINZ first to discuss what financial assisstance I will be eligible for - I don't want to end up in unnecessary debt again. That's the only hurdle really. I also have to stop my current gym membership (which involves basically a phone call) and find out how we'd go about moving my possessions from A to B. On the bright side, the property is fine with cats, and being an outside smoker should be totally ok. I've seen the outside of the unit, and it's a nice little brick and tile place. If I had felt more welcome upon returning here I wouldn't be so serious about moving, but staying around all this negativity will be bad for me, so I'm going to just cut my losses and go for it.

I'll write more later.
<3
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