I did it.
Like little red lines, they go across my upper thigh. I hate it. Just looking, I'm disgusting myself. It feels like my only way to relieve stress, and when I do it I can't feel it. Like I am gone.

I know there are other ways to get rid of this pain. I am going to try them, I have to stop letting this get the best of me...
I'm going to tell my boyfriend tomorrow. I a, going to show him the scars. I hope he accpets me still I know I will cry, I know I...

This time won't you save me?
I think it's time I gice up. Or have I already given up?
Is life really planned out from the moment you take your first breath? If it is, is there a reason some of us have a "destiny" to be lost? Are we there to get saved? Or are we here because even if we can't deal with our own problems, we can solve everybody elses? No matter if their problem is the same or more difficult then our own?
What am I worth?
Nothing.
I feel...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!
It's sucks. It will be my birthday in a couple hours and I have to go the hospital.
I lost my only friend, but gained my ex of four years. We are completely starting over.
And you know what??? I hate it.
Alan, was my only friend he taught me everything. He was my love and strength. I would give up Bryan(boyfriend) for Alan. Alan doesnt have a place in my heart. He became my heart.
My Family situation. I feel like I don't belong...

1. Love

I have no idea what the thing above is.... ok...
Soo, I can finally listen to sad songs withouth getting sad I learned from my only friend not to take things or anyone for granted. And I am not going to antmote. I will look back on the memories someday, not today, but someday. And when that day comes I am going to have someone beside me, anybody. Theyll be there watching and listening. That will be the day Ill smile huge, but it will be the day you realize you took me for...

Hey guys. I just needed to get this out of my system. Lately, for three or so years i have had this extreme pain in my left rib cage. It hurts and stabd when I touch it. It feels like it sqeeuzes that entire area sometims. I am really scared, because I think its a form of cancer. I am not sure, but I know I am at a high risk because of my artheritites. Yes, Im a kid, with RA. I have very scared, and realized if cancer woul destroy my life I would not want that to happen. So, I made an appuontment...

For a couple hours I was happy.
Now my depression is coming back.......................
I am so alone
I have ruined everything
It is all my fault
I am so so sorry

I cant live like this

I thought yuu were differnt. I thought yuu were there for me but yuu used me. Everyone else left. Yuu arent my friend Alyss. No no I am alone again.
i just want my blodd. Noone else.
Fuck i miss yuu bryan..mfml

I waann cut, as simple as that.
Tomorrow i will
Im tried of being strong
Im better weak nd covered in blood
F**KKK

I dont my mother anymore
Did I even know her at all?
i look at her facebook pictures and realize the face is a stranger
Not that I care anyway
I dont even know my little sister RaeRae or my little brother Boon..
What has this come to?
Their getting sucked into mothers lies
And i cant do anything
I promise I will go to court when I am 18 and you will be mine
But thats 4 yrs from now..
And Im terrified..Its already too late.....

Even though I really love you...Im going to smile because I deserve to.
AND you just might be right, goodbye is a second chance...
But, you said goodbye when I never left. You didnt say goodbye when I really left.
NOW, you want to talk to me, but I just gave up already.
Dont take it the wrong way-I love you so much. I want to marry you and have kids.
But I just cant do this anymore....
Maybe I need to think. Maybe I need to get away for awhile.
I...