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Everything Sucks

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Posted August 26th 2011 at 05:45 AM by Hopeyyy

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!
It's sucks. It will be my birthday in a couple hours and I have to go the hospital.
I lost my only friend, but gained my ex of four years. We are completely starting over.
And you know what??? I hate it.
Alan, was my only friend he taught me everything. He was my love and strength. I would give up Bryan(boyfriend) for Alan. Alan doesnt have a place in my heart. He became my heart.
My Family situation. I feel like I don't belong anywhere. Over with my Dad there was too much freedom, they smoked weed...my own half-sister! I don't do that! It disgust me!! Over here I am always blamed for everything and I alaays get in extreme yelling and glare fights witg my half sister April. I have no where to go. No where to turn. I have no idea what to do with my life.
It sucks to be a teenager. I never had a chance to be a kid. I don't want to be an adult. I seriously and literally feel like NOTHING. It's killing me on how alone I truly am.
And I try to push everything back and focus on making others happy. I know it isn't good for me. But now that Alan is gone, I haven't a shoulder to cry on, or a smile to laugh on.
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