Slowly falling,
Losing sight of all she has accomplished.
Music plays lound in her headphones,
Expressing what she won't say.
She dosn't know how to keep trying,
So she just sits there.
Staring at nothing,
Thinking of what has happened and whats to come.
Her thoughs become crowded,
Until it feels like she has to swim through glue to do anything.
She trys to think of ways to clear her thoughs,
But only knows one way,...

Afraid to leave the house
I hate to hear what they say
But I guess it's true
Because I believe it all now too
They tell me I'm worthless
That I need to kill myself
What they don't know is that I'm close to doing that my own
I don't need their encouragement
I cut my wrist to show the pain that words cannot describe
To show how much i hate myself on my own body
They don't know I do it or that I starve myself and throw up hoping...

A razor down my wrist
As I give night one sweat last kiss
My room is dark, my music blasts
No one hears my sobs
I get lightheaded and feel my body hit the floor
My bones break...
I'm now so fragile, so small
I realize the blood now...
I'm in a puddle of it
For a moment I am terrified
But then I realize this is what I want...
To free everyone from me
To get away from this horrible place
My life is gone... I am free of...

My stomach twists with hunger.
But I don't care.
My mom said i could not cut.
What she does not know will not hurt her.
Only me.
I want to be free of this world.
I want to be home with my God.
I wonder why i have to stay here.
I can't do anything right.
I can't help people.
Can i please just leave?

I look happy right? Haha i think thats one of my biggest lies... I'm hardly ever happy.. I wear bright colors and a fake smile that no one can see through.... No one in my family knows that i starve myself... They dont know that i still cut... They think i stop months ago... I did try to stop but i can't.. I dont know if I'll ever be able to.. or if I'll ever be the same again... Right now my only hope is to be skinny and beautiful.. and then when i am that i will be able to stop cutting and that...