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I hate you ED
Posted July 15th 2015 at 02:51 AM by Evanesco
I'm so hungry. My stomach hurts so bad. But I can't eat. My partner made me have lunch today and I managed half of what they gave me which wasn't much to start with, and only because they sat next to me and waited. And dinner, their mum made soup, and I managed a few mouthfuls. This has been going on for days. I thought I had been getting better. I was managing at least one proper meal a day. But now I can't.
I wish I could eat, it would stop my stomach hurting, it would mean I'd be able to sleep, it would stop my partner worrying. But I can't. I've tried and I can't. It's too hard. Recovery is too hard. What's the point anyway? This has been going on for eight years, I'm never going to recover fully. Might as well just let it happen. Only my partner even believes it's real anyway. I have no one to help me except them, and I don't like talking about it to them because they're a recovered bulimic and I'm scared of triggering them to relapse.
All I can think about is food.
I wish I could eat, it would stop my stomach hurting, it would mean I'd be able to sleep, it would stop my partner worrying. But I can't. I've tried and I can't. It's too hard. Recovery is too hard. What's the point anyway? This has been going on for eight years, I'm never going to recover fully. Might as well just let it happen. Only my partner even believes it's real anyway. I have no one to help me except them, and I don't like talking about it to them because they're a recovered bulimic and I'm scared of triggering them to relapse.
All I can think about is food.
Total Comments 1
Comments
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I'm sorry things are so tough. What are some things that have worked in the past? Try to reach out to your partner. They seem worried already so asking to talk about it might gives a heads up to them and they can tell you if it is triggering or not. Hope things improvePosted July 16th 2015 at 04:44 AM by Not_here
