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Better day but still bad.
Posted June 27th 2011 at 09:49 PM by Evanesco
Today was a lot better than yesterday. Except that I've eaten too much.
It makes me angry, just how little self control I have.
I wish I could just stop eating.
I feel so bloated and fat right now and I hate it.
Prom tomorrow. I'm trying to act cheerful but I'm terrified. I don't want to dress up in front of people. I want to stay at home in bed.
I might not eat tomorrow. I'll be the thin girl who has so much self control she only drinks water and doesn't eat anything and everyone will envy my self control.
But they won't because I'm still fat, so they'll just think it's good that I'm not eating because perhaps then I'll be less of a hephalump.
I already know that I'll never be happy with my body. But I'd rather have and hate a skinny body than a fat body.
It makes me angry, just how little self control I have.
I wish I could just stop eating.
I feel so bloated and fat right now and I hate it.
Prom tomorrow. I'm trying to act cheerful but I'm terrified. I don't want to dress up in front of people. I want to stay at home in bed.
I might not eat tomorrow. I'll be the thin girl who has so much self control she only drinks water and doesn't eat anything and everyone will envy my self control.
But they won't because I'm still fat, so they'll just think it's good that I'm not eating because perhaps then I'll be less of a hephalump.
I already know that I'll never be happy with my body. But I'd rather have and hate a skinny body than a fat body.
Total Comments 2
Comments
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Just thought I'd say:
I've seen your pictures and you are beautiful the way you are. You're skinny and pretty and I'd kill to look like you. Hell, I'd possibly relinquish my Dr Who dvds for it...and that's saying a LOT D:
I know it's hard when you see yourself in a mirror sometimes, but that reflection isn't what everyone else sees, and I know that I can't make it better just by telling you, but it will get better eventually. You'll look in a mirror and think "Woah! Have I always looked this fantastic?"
[Btdubs, the answer is HELLLLL YEAAAAAH]
Luff you muchos, you pretty lil' thing <3Posted June 27th 2011 at 10:29 PM by
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Thanks.
But it's hard to believe I'm not fat when the people closest to me believe that I am.Posted June 27th 2011 at 10:32 PM by Evanesco 
