Stupid, Useless, Ignorant, Careless, Idiot ,Die Emma! (Trig)
Posted April 25th 2011 at 09:27 PM by Anatidaephobia
I feel so guilty. I know that shes only trying to help but it makes me feel so much worse By saying all those nice things i feel so awful. I don't deserve compliments or anything nice said about me because i am a horrible bitch.
I overdosed again yesterday. Still feel like crap but i guess that thats what you get. I wish it would have worked and that i would have just died. It would be best for everyone.
I have been cutting more and more recently. I just want to feel the pain, and it means that i suffer like i deserve. But i hate having to hide it. It's making me paranoid and that makes everything worse.
I really don't want to go back to school on wednesday. I am falling further and further behind and i don't think i can stand to be around all those people. The though of not been able to cut in the day scares me aswell and the fact that the teachers have been told to keep an eye on me. I hate that i don't know what they know.
I also have to see my so called friend who i had a huge argument with. I don't think i can stand to be around her. She always says something that makes me feel so much worse. She practically told me it would be best if i died. Maybe shes right. Wednesdays just going to be so hard. I think it would be easier if i just disappeared. The scary thing is i have a fool proof plan that is almost perfect. Don't know what to do anymore. Don't feel safe right now. I am starting to believe that he is right and that noone cares about me at all and that i am just a stupid mistake that should go jump of the tallest and closest building to do everyone a favour.
I overdosed again yesterday. Still feel like crap but i guess that thats what you get. I wish it would have worked and that i would have just died. It would be best for everyone.
I have been cutting more and more recently. I just want to feel the pain, and it means that i suffer like i deserve. But i hate having to hide it. It's making me paranoid and that makes everything worse.
I really don't want to go back to school on wednesday. I am falling further and further behind and i don't think i can stand to be around all those people. The though of not been able to cut in the day scares me aswell and the fact that the teachers have been told to keep an eye on me. I hate that i don't know what they know.
I also have to see my so called friend who i had a huge argument with. I don't think i can stand to be around her. She always says something that makes me feel so much worse. She practically told me it would be best if i died. Maybe shes right. Wednesdays just going to be so hard. I think it would be easier if i just disappeared. The scary thing is i have a fool proof plan that is almost perfect. Don't know what to do anymore. Don't feel safe right now. I am starting to believe that he is right and that noone cares about me at all and that i am just a stupid mistake that should go jump of the tallest and closest building to do everyone a favour.
Total Comments 4
Comments
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Posted April 25th 2011 at 10:02 PM by Palmolive -
Posted April 25th 2011 at 10:35 PM by WhisperingSilence -
You are a precious girl Emma. Don't ever let anyone, including you, tell you anything different. You deserve life at its very best
Posted April 26th 2011 at 03:47 AM by Blair -
Hey Emma sorry to know you're feeling this way. You wudn't be doing anyone a favour by commiting suicide huni. you know that. people who say horrid things and make you feel crap don't really care do they, and cannot be called 'friends' or 'loved ones'. You are so beautiful Emma and have got so much strnegth. espite whatever you're going through you always look out for others here on TH, you always look out for me. That means souch to me coz no-one else gives a crap.
Suicide is a permanent answer to a temporary problem. Keep that in mind huni coz this won't last forever. You will come out of this in a much better place, as a stronger person. Stay strong hun.. Love you <3 xxxPosted April 26th 2011 at 09:34 PM by x_sepi_x